Nutz: Chasing a Noodle

I used to be indecisive... now I'm not so sure. 
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Half-English Breakfast

This morning we ate breakfast in the hotel and I was pleasantly surprised to find a spread that included some nice looking fruit (photograph 1).

Tell me: why is that we, as humans, feel the need to saunter into a breakfast room, walk up to a table and move a chair about 2 inches before we go up and start drooling over the breakfast delights? I guess it is a form of staking ownership on territory. In the animal kingdom, of course, an animal will mark its territory by urinating around the edge of it - something that I think the restaurant manager, this morning, would undoubtedly have frowned upon.

Whilst teaching Sayaka some important English phrases, such as "shut your cakehole", I tucked into what I named my 'half-English breakfast' (photograph 2). This consisted of cold egg formed into shapes (not fun shapes, like hedgehogs or lions, though), with ham, sausages and toast. Ok, I say "toast", but I actually mean "warm bread". The toaster was about as much use as a jelly in a rainstorm (marginally useful, because you could use it as a hat).

I was part way through eating my cooked breakfast when I looked to my left and saw Sayaka mixing up a disgusting looking substance in a little pot. Rather stupidly, I asked what it was, and she told me to taste some. Even more stupidly, I agreed and tried it. I can only describe it as a mixture of beans, marmite and snot - in looks and taste. Photograph 3 shows this grim concoction.

The final photograph of this ever-expanding blog post is of a cool little contraption that I've nicknamed Maggie Jam. Rather than spending time applying margarine and jam to your warm bread, you simply grip the little plastic thing and squeeze. Bingo, out comes your margarine and jam together (photograph 4). It's very clever. However, you don't need Theo Profiterole, the Dragon, to point out its fatal flaw:- supposing you don't want margarine?

I'm told that this will be our last non-Japanese style breakfast for a few days. So, no doubt it'll be snot, beans and marmite for breakfast tomorrow. Would you like me to put some in a pot and bring it back for you to taste?

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